Three years ago, I lost a close friend. We had known each other since I was a sophomore in high school and he was a senior at the time. He was one of my closest friends over the next nine years. I was able to tell him things that I hadn’t been able to tell more than a couple of people.
For me, he was one of those people that I had and still have a deep appreciation for, but somehow I never told him that. We always think that we have more time with the people in our life; to continue to grow with each other, learn about each other, and say the things that we want to. But somehow the way we expect life to turn out and the way that it actually does are two very different things.
We are left with the feelings of guilt, regret, nostalgia, and an unspoken love and appreciation for the ones we have loved and lost. I hope that you know that I miss you and think of you everyday. So this is for you.
To the One Who Will Never Know
For years I hid
in the swallows
of my mind
condemning myself
to solitude
words would gather themselves
into a single file line
and march
to the cusp, before retreating
never truly crossing the barrier
again and again they tried
except time was a paradox
bringing me courage
while the coward
stole what I held dear
it ripped you from life
leaving us tethered
together, forever
out of regret and
unspoken love
Amy Hardesty 